Overview

""You're being ridiculous!"" contains true stories of my experiences at the mercy of my foster children. I have written about the trials and tribulations of being a foster carer and the love and laughter that this has brought to me over the last six years. The first to arrive were Owen, aged seven and Neil, aged six. I write of the events of their arrival, their likeness to a couple of lion cubs and their irrational inability to agree on who went first or last at anything. A shopping trip that resulted in unattended children being returned to me like lost property. A freezer incident in a supermarket that was nothing short of horrific with a child having to be pulled from a chest freezer. A trip to a soft play centre that can only make you recoil in embarrassment for me. Should I mention the pee wars debacle, a six year olds explanation of mating Turtles and an excruciating tea time conversations? Out of the mouths of babes and you can join with me in my feelings of despair of these moments while also hearing the ringing of the choral tutters in my ears; my description of bystanders who tut their disapproval as if their children would never behave in this way. I continue with the antics of Josh (nine), William (eight), Max (five), Tom (three), Brian (seven) and Kevin (seven). There are stories of Josh's ability to fix my Wi-Fi, Williams comedic skills, Max's desires to be a pirate and Tom's way of saying excuse me that nearly drove me to distraction - Coomee! A painfully long weekend with Brian who spoke as if he was fifty and thought I was obtuse. Then there was Kevin who literally said Kevin-says-no to every question whether his final answer was no or not. Finally, Jamie was five when he came to me and his questions, often anatomical, always posed in the most earnest of fashions but in the most awkward of places and ones that I was always ill prepared for answering. His torturous counting incorrectly to 100 on a car journey. His lack of knowledge and shock at realising that girls don't have a penis and the conversation that then ensued. His swimming pool changing room observation of a furry lady and his earnest description announced to everyone as to how he thought the daddy's seeds get into mummy's tummy; they eat them apparently! Boys will be boys and I loved everyone of them. Combined with these true tales, I have also included the odd bit of slightly more serious text to remind the reader that these children are vulnerable but were also fiercely protected by me under any circumstances and regardless of the volume of choral tutting! No one is left in any doubt about the love, laughter and joy that being a foster carer has brought to me. My joy at having been a part of their lives and my hope that one day they may come back into my life with their own memories.

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9781999985806

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See Amazon reviews or Years of reading selfishly blog : Thank you very much to C.E.A. Forster for supplying me with a copy of her book in exchange for an honest review. I have to admit that I wanted to review this book because I was curious about the world of fostering, having had no experience of it whatsoever. I naively assumed that because I am a parent, I would understand what it takes to be a foster carer - I could not have been more wrong! You're Being Ridiculous is the story of how Claire started fostering children and how she dealt with the everyday and not so everyday situations she found herself in! What I found really refreshing about this book is that Claire does not claim to be any sort of foster carer expert, instead we see each situation as she deals with it, and the questions she has to ask herself as to how she should react appropriately. As a mum, you can pretty much react in any way you want, and say whatever gets you through the tricky situation - as a foster carer, there is an added layer of responsibility and set of guidelines you are expected to follow which only adds to Claire's dilemmas as she deals with the children in her care. The situations that Claire and her foster children find themselves in are at times simply hilarious, and the scene in Aldi (you have to read it to believe it!), made me really laugh out loud. That is undoubtedly down to the no nonsense, relatable way in which Claire writes. It was also interesting to see how other people in the big wide world react to the sometimes unpredictable behaviour of the children, and that tutting is definitely the universal language of misunderstanding! As a parent of a child with special needs that really resonated with me, as I have lost count of the number of times I have had to deal with stares and exaggerated tutting when my son doesn't behave in a certain way. I always think it would be very interesting to see how people would behave if they had to walk a mile in my shoes, and am sure that Claire must feel the same! This is not to say that the book is just about the funny things that happen as Claire ventures into the world of fostering. It is also balanced by the reality of what the young people in Claire's care are going through. We don't know what place they are in their lives, and what they have seen or heard, and cannot begin to comprehend what they are thinking about as they find themselves in the house of a stranger for the first time. Some of the most poignant scenes are where the children are trying to process what is happening to them, and how they deal with having been placed in Claire's house. For me, this is the strength of You're Being Ridiculous - it could have been a flippant book filled with funny stories, but you can really feel the passion and love that Claire has for what she is doing. As she gains experience (and that you need to have spares of everything just in case!), she learns how to adapt to each child, and that though one child may be really introverted and another is a non-stop dynamo, the most important thing you can do is just be there for the child when they need you. You're Being Ridiculous is not a long book - it comes in at two hundred pages, but it is full of emotion, laughter and compassion, something that jumps out at you from every page. Claire has clearly found her vocation in foster caring, and her ability to tell her story so well and with so much love for the children who are lucky enough to come into her care, is a joy to read. I hope that she is going to keep writing it all down for us, and hopefully we will see a sequel to You're Being Ridiculous soon!

Author Information

C. E. A. Forster, is a pen name and an anagram of Foster Care. The purpose of my writing with a pen name, as I hope you can appreciate, is to protect not just my identity but the identities of all of the children I have cared for and will refer to. The book is factual but all names have been changed. I live in the UK. Aside from fostering, I live a fairly normal life. I go out to work, I pay a mortgage, I do all of the fun but sometimes mundane things that most of us do day in day out. I never would have imagined that I could have written a book and I suspect that this is a one off so please just enjoy it. This book was originally written for my own benefit, so that in my old age I would never forget the love and the laughter that being a foster carer has brought to me. I simply want to share it with you.

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