Overview

Driven by charged and complex relationships, this lyrical, emotional coming-of-age YA debut follows a ChineseAmerican teen in the wake of her first love's death by suicide.Not real. The mantra seventeen-year-old Ninarepeats to herself the morning after her almost-boyfriend, Ethan Travvers, jumped onto the tracks in front of afreight train. The two words that keep the truth just far enough away so the loss can't touch her, grief can't breakher. After all, there is the family image to uphold, especially when her father's startup is falling apart. Maintainingthe illusion of wholeness and success within their tight-knit California community is everything to Nina's momand grandma.The pretense is working--until Nina's all-star older sister, Carmen, is dismissed from collegeand abruptly returns home. Carmen's arrival and strange behavior dig up buried memories, leading Nina towonder if there is more to the story of Ethan than even she knew. The truth is not what she wants to believe: about Carmen, about Ethan, but mostly, about herself.Emotionally layered and unflinchingly honest, this novelwill resonate with readers who love deeply affecting stories that tackle teen heartache in the vein of KathleenGlasgow and Laura Nowlin.

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9798228501706

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Cindy Kay is a Chinese Thai American narrator and educator who grew up in the California Bay Area and lives in the Rockies. Her work has been described as listening to a ""cozy best friend."" She narrates fiction and nonfiction, and has studied Spanish, Portuguese, Thai, and Japanese.

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