Overview

This special edition features a foil-stamped paper over board cover, stenciled sprayed edges, and bonus content! Amber Smith's extraordinary, New York Times bestselling, TikTok sensation debut novel ""is a heart-twisting, but ultimately hopeful, exploration of how pain can lead to strength"" (The Boston Globe) about a teenager struggling to cope in the aftermath of being assaulted. Eden has always been good at being good. Starting high school doesn't change that. But the night her brother's best friend rapes her, Eden's world capsizes. What was once simple is now complex. What Eden once loved--who she once loved--she now hates. What she thought she knew to be true is now lies. Nothing makes sense anymore, and she knows she's supposed to tell someone what happened, but she can't. So she buries it instead. And she buries the way she used to be. Told in four parts--freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior year--this provocative debut reveals the deep cuts of trauma. But it also demonstrates one young woman's strength as she navigates the disappointment and unbearable pains of adolescence, of first love and first heartbreak, and of friendships broken and rebuilt, all while learning to embrace the power of survival she never knew she had hidden within her heart.

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Reviews

""Readers will root for her as she gathers the courage, at last, to speak up.""-- ""B&N Teen blog"" ""A difficult, painful journey, but teens who have experienced rape and abuse will be grateful for this unvarnished and ultimately hopeful portrait. Eden's shell-shocked narrative is an excellent narrative conduit for what Smith has to say.""--Booklist ""February 1, 2016"" ""A heart-twisting, but ultimately hopeful, exploration of how pain can lead to strength."" -- ""The Boston Globe"" ""This young adult novel is an unflinching look at the struggles of a rape victim to process her trauma and find the strength to rebuild her life."" --Laurie Halse Anderson, New York Times bestselling and award-winning author of Speak and Shout ""The Way I Used to Be explores the aftermath of sexual assault with a precision and searing honesty that is often terrifying, sometimes eerily beautiful, and always completely true. It is The Hero's Journey through a distorted circus mirror--one girl's quest to turn desperation into courage, to become a survivor instead of a victim. Amber Smith gets it exactly right.""--Amy Reed, author of BEAUTIFUL and CLEAN ""The Way I Used To Be is an intensely gripping and raw look at secrets, silence, speaking out, and survival in the aftermath of a sexual assault. A must-have for every collection that serves teens.""-- ""SLJ / Teen Librarian Toolbox"" ""A poignant and painfully honest survival story about the aftermath of trauma. Amber Smith weaves Eden's narrative with a deft, empathetic touch that doesn't shy away from difficult truths. This is a courageous, necessary, and beautiful book."" --Kathleen Glasgow, author of Girl in Pieces, The Agathas, and How to Make Friends With the Dark ""Edy's exploration of the meaning of sexuality and intimacy will be thought provoking for teen readers of various experience levels, and this title is likely to find space alongside [Laurie Halse] Anderson's Speak."" -- ""BCCB"" STARRED REVIEW ""This is a poignant book that realistically looks at the lasting effects of trauma on love, relationships, and life....Teens will be reminded of Laurie Halse Anderson's Speak. VERDICT An important addition for every collection.""-- ""School Library Journal""

Author Information

Amber Smith is the New York Times, USA TODAY, and internationally bestselling author of the young adult novels The Way I Used to Be, The Last to Let Go, Something Like Gravity, and The Way I Am Now. An advocate for increased awareness of gendered violence and LGBTQIA+ equality, she writes in the hope that her books can help foster change and spark dialogue. She lives in Ithaca, New York, with her wife and coauthor, Sam Gellar, and their ever-growing family of rescued dogs and cats. You can find her online at AmberSmithAuthor.com.

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