Overview

For fans of Jennette McCurdy’s I’m Glad My Mom Died, a memoir for daughters who recognize that to truly understand themselves and the patterns of their lives, they must first understand their mothers and the forces that shaped these women. When Margaret Whitford’s mother was dying, she told those present that her daughter “had her history.” This was true; Margaret had conducted interviews with her mother during the last decade of her life. But this didn’t end their estrangement, and Margaret chose not to return to her mother’s side during her final days. In this memoir, Margaret confronts this decision by unearthing in her mother’s traumatic history the roots of the emotional distance between them. She explores how a history marked by the devastation of World War II in Europe, a violent childhood home, and sexual assault accumulated into complex PTSD that shaped her mother and the way she parented Margaret as her firstborn and as a daughter—and, in turn, how Margaret carried her mother’s trauma forward in her sense of self, in her relationships to others, and in the ways she navigated her world. Indeed, Margaret not only had her mother’s history—she embodied it. Ultimately, The History We Carry confronts the legacy of intergenerational trauma with wisdom and compassion, revealing how familial history shapes each of us but need not be wholly determinative of whom we become and how we choose to live. 

Full Product Details

9798896363224

Table of Contents

Reviews

“An unflinching, well-rendered memoir that generously encompasses love, trauma, and the fraught relationship between a mother and daughter.”—Kirkus Reviews (starred review) “Margaret Whitford’s compelling memoir—a reflection on her family history, her relationship with her mother, and trauma that spans generations—is clear-eyed, compassionate, and often startling in its insight and originality. I was engrossed from beginning to end.”—Clifford Thompson, author of Jazz June: A Self-Portrait in Essays   “Rarely have I finished a memoir understanding how our histories, both personal and generational, live and breathe within us in the present. By unearthing the complicated and poignant relationship she has with her mother, Margaret Whitford also powerfully speaks to the collective soul-searching so vitally necessary during these trying times. Written in elegant, luminous prose, this is a memoir that will stay with you long after the story is told.”—Ken Harvey, author of The Book of Casey Adair   “Despite Tolstoy’s famous quote—families are generally neither happy nor unhappy—they are complicated, like Whitford’s. This important memoir delves into sibling conflict, parental infidelity, and substance abuse. Overlying these familial tensions is geopolitical upheaval and the effects of successive world wars, almost unwanted family members themselves. The History We Carry seats them together at its literary table and gives each their due in courageous, precise, and ultimately both urgent and forgiving prose.”—Sue William Silverman, author of Selected Misdemeanors: Essays at the Mercy of the Reader   “An exhilarating mix of memoir and deep personal research, The History We Carry explores a mother’s complex history and a daughter’s lifelong struggle to understand and connect with her mother. In clear prose that never presents simple answers but rather digs to discover unknown truths and questions even her own long-held narratives, Margaret Whitford has written a robust story of love and trauma.”—Sheryl St. Germain, author of 50 Miles   “All our parents live lives before we arrive, lives that come to bear on our own. In this new memoir, Margaret Whitford bravely ventures into her mother’s past to better understand her own present and future. The History We Carry is a gorgeously written book about generational trauma and the intersections of love and grief. It’s a stunning debut.”—Lee Martin, author of Pulitzer Prize finalist The Bright Forever  

Author Information

Margaret Whitford served in leadership positions within the nonprofit world for twenty years, including ten years in the social justice field, before turning to writing. She is fascinated by the ways in which we all seek to create places of refuge for ourselves, both in a metaphorical and a physical sense. The History We Carry is her first memoir. An avid Francophile, Margaret, with her husband, divides her time between a small village in the South of France and her home in Concord, Massachusetts. 

Tab Content 6

Countries Available