Overview

A Family Saga: Striving For SolaceThis memoir describes our family's journey through grief towards healing after our youngest son, Sean, took his life in 2012. He was 35 years old and had struggled for many years with depression and paranoia. Many reminiscences, including joyous and unforgettable moments, later enabled us to cope with the anguish of his death. Memories were a central underpinning of support at the most difficult times. Guided by my son's questions and curiosity the memoir spans three continents. It reflects his keen interest in our memorable family visit to South Africa, his birthplace, the brutality of apartheid that resulted in our immigration to Canada and the family's challenges that ensued. The memoir also explores the intergenerational trauma of my father whose close family perished in Latvia during the Holocaust. Through my passage of introspection, during bereavement, I confronted my own vulnerability and reached into my formerly unacknowledged emotional depths. I realized that death and loss can wound each of us in many ways, unrelated to mental health, especially as millions now grieve the passing of family and friends during the Covid-19 pandemic. I hope that our family's decade of lessons learnt and striving for solace might provide a beacon of hope to others to steer through their own darkness to inner peace, lead to acceptance, and help to alleviate the suffering of others.

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9781778138904

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Reviews

"""You, Henry are witness not only to your and Marcia's loss but to that of your father and the effects of devastating trauma on the generations that followed him. That you are witness and now scribe allows the hidden to become heard and once it has a name it can be taken out and placed at a distance, where at best it can be understood."" -Adrian Kohler and Basil Jones. Co-Founders Handspring Puppet Company, Cape Town, South Africa ""Your memoir is very moving and profound, permeated with your warm heart. Your sorrow is real, but always you place others in the forefront, and you give prominence to the positive and the creative."" -Tim Huisamen, Lecturer in Afrikaans & Netherlandic Studies, Makhanda (Grahamstown), South Africa ""This is a story that is deeply meaningful to those who never pictured themselves in the same position, who do not know where to turn, or who don't know how to reckon with the fallout and the changes to family, let alone to the inner life."" -Susan Scott, Editor Body & Soul, Ontario, Canada ""A true labour of love which will have great relevance and meaning for all those who have suffered loss of any kind, and for all those privileged enough to read it."" -Deborah Gibson. English Teacher, Stratford, Canada. ""Your book is a beautiful tribute to Sean and to your family. It is poignant, affecting and moving. And your style, cadence and use of language are lovely throughout."" -Frances Latchford. Associate Professor, School of Gender, Sexuality, & Women's Studies, York University, Toronto, Canada"

You, Henry are witness not only to your and Marcia's loss but to that of your father and the effects of devastating trauma on the generations that followed him. That you are witness and now scribe allows the hidden to become heard and once it has a name it can be taken out and placed at a distance, where at best it can be understood. -Adrian Kohler and Basil Jones. Co-Founders Handspring Puppet Company, Cape Town, South Africa Your memoir is very moving and profound, permeated with your warm heart. Your sorrow is real, but always you place others in the forefront, and you give prominence to the positive and the creative. -Tim Huisamen, Lecturer in Afrikaans & Netherlandic Studies, Makhanda (Grahamstown), South Africa This is a story that is deeply meaningful to those who never pictured themselves in the same position, who do not know where to turn, or who don't know how to reckon with the fallout and the changes to family, let alone to the inner life. -Susan Scott, Editor Body & Soul, Ontario, Canada A true labour of love which will have great relevance and meaning for all those who have suffered loss of any kind, and for all those privileged enough to read it. -Deborah Gibson. English Teacher, Stratford, Canada. Your book is a beautiful tribute to Sean and to your family. It is poignant, affecting and moving. And your style, cadence and use of language are lovely throughout. -Frances Latchford. Associate Professor, School of Gender, Sexuality, & Women's Studies, York University, Toronto, Canada

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