Overview

In this thought-provoking memoir, Nancy Gerber maps the wrenching terrain of caring for an elderly parent. In the fall of 1995, at the age of 73, the author's father suffered a massive stroke on the right side of the brain, rendering him permanently disabled. This catastrophic event plunged the author and her family into a crisis for which they were completely unprepared, one that included financial worries; the need to hire full-time, live-in help; and the specter of putting her father into a nursing home. Even more wrenching was the demise of the parent she had always known. From an active, gregarious man with hobbies and friends - a man who had been working at the time of the stroke - her father became withdrawn, hostile, and silent. This profound loss was aggravated by the stress and anxiety that characterize family caregiving. In honest, evocative prose, the author describes her struggle to negotiate the competing demands of love, filial responsibility, familial conflict, and personal autonomy that arise when a parent becomes ill.

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9780761831129

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Reviews

At a mere 81 pages, this book merits consideration in a wide array of disciplines as an ancillary text... here is a small memoir crafted not by a scholar of aging or an everyday caregiver but by a professor with an English degree, someone who can turn mere words into powerful swords, conveying deep meanings. It can be recommended as a resource for caregivers, caregiving support groups, and families of stroke survivors...--Carol A. Gosselink Psyccritiques

As her book shows through wrenching examples, care for her father is necessary, required and urgent, but women are not always in a position to give it freely.--Summer/Fall 2007 Mothering, Race, Ethnicity, Culture and Class

At a mere 81 pages, this book merits consideration in a wide array of disciplines as an ancillary text... here is a small memoir crafted not by a scholar of aging or an everyday caregiver but by a professor with an English degree, someone who can turn mere words into powerful swords, conveying deep meanings. It can be recommended as a resource for caregivers, caregiving support groups, and families of stroke survivors... -- Carol A. Gosselink PsycCRITIQUES As her book shows through wrenching examples, care for her father is necessary, required and urgent, but women are not always in a position to give it freely. -- Summer/Fall 2007 Mothering, Race, Ethnicity, Culture and Class As her book shows through wrenching examples, care for her father is necessay, required, and urgent, but women are not always in a position to give it freely. Journal Of The Association For Research On Mothering, March 2008 The everydayness of the experience of Gerber's...work offers some of the most fertile ground for feminist analysis within and outside of women's studies courses. [It offers]...a rich and meaningful way to analyze rigorously the role of dutiful daughter, the evolution of the U.S. health care system, and the complexity of family dynamics. -- Annie Dollin, Northern Kentucky University Feminist Formations

Author Information

Nancy Gerber holds a doctorate in Literatures in English from Rutgers University. The author of Portrait of the Mother-Artist: Class and Creativity in Contemporary American Fiction (Lexington Books, 2003), she has taught in the English and Women's Studies departments at Rutgers University, Newark. She lives in Montclair, New Jersey, with her family and can be reached at n.gerber@att.net or through her web site, www.nancygerber.net .

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