Overview

These days, who doesn't want to be a lesbian In literature and life, entertainment and sport, lesbians are the arbiters of what's hot and what's chic. However, like anything which requires a major break with old habits, becoming a lesbian is not the easiest thing in the world to do. There are rules. In this comprehensive, if irreverent, self-help manual, Helen Eisenbach throws open the closet door and makes effortless what was considered a difficult lifestyle. By sharing her professionalism on the nuances of the language, and the correct way to seduce one's brother's girlfriend, she takes the reader through to the big question: who does what to whom in the bedroom

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9781860494659

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It's canny and campy, tender but butch, trashy, sexy, witty and informative. In other words, it's not just important, it's silly * JOHN Q WEIR, author of THE IRREVERSIBLE DECLINE OF EDDIE SOCKET * Helen Eisenbach, lesbianism has always been easy! You just figured that out? Silly girl * RITA MAE BROWN * It's a million laughs * NEWSDAY * A funny, often insightful self-help guide to discovering the lesbian within * LIFE *

A funny, often insightful self-help guide to discovering the lesbian within * LIFE * It's a million laughs * NEWSDAY * Helen Eisenbach, lesbianism has always been easy! You just figured that out? Silly girl * RITA MAE BROWN * It's canny and campy, tender but butch, trashy, sexy, witty and informative. In other words, it's not just important, it's silly * JOHN Q WEIR, author of THE IRREVERSIBLE DECLINE OF EDDIE SOCKET *

An insider's sophomoric paean to the lesbian way of life. Former QW editor and novelist Eisenbach (Loonglow, 1988) seems to have a lot going for her in her latest literary/comic endeavor. She has a firm grasp on the ins and outs of lesbianism - lesbian chic, lesbian sex, lesbian fantasy - and a subtle understanding of where truth and stereotype converge. Her subject she rightly if mockingly points out, is a source of fascination to the populace at large and heterosexual men in particular. Unfortunately, Eisenbach just can't sustain the humor that is the raison d'etre of her book. Not that she doesn't have moments. She opines that S&M, for example, is an option for those who don't receive enough sadomasochistic thrills simply by being female in any city in the United States, the corporate world at large, or certain department stores during major clearance seasons. And she provides alternatives to the standard altar-boy/priest paradigm, such as First Lady/'friendly' journalist, Republican socialite/Whoopi Goldberg, or Anyone (except Madonna)/Camille Paglia. There are also some poignant moments in her Woman of Your Dreams series, where Eisenbach imagines various scenarios of women meeting women. In one, the woman of your dreams, at whom you've been staring, actually comes over to you in the airport, smiling, and in a devastating European accent asks, Could you be telling me, em, where is this Delta Airline? I am must meeting my husband. Most of the time, however, Eisenbach's jokes are really nothing more than one-liners stretched beyond their breaking point. And the mock-instructional tone quickly wears on the nerves. At best, some erotic/romantic moments and inside jokes for lesbian readers. (Kirkus Reviews)

Author Information

Helen Eisenbach is the writer and director of Lesbian Bathhouse. She is a former editor of the magazine QW and is a contributor to NEW YORK MAGAZINE, THE VILLAGE VOICE and other publications. She has also written one previous novel.

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