Overview

This book draws on interviews with women who left relationships with women to begin relationships with men, and uncovers how the women make sense of who they are. The women who leave female partners to begin relationships with male partners have the capacity to redefine their sexual identity. They can essentially call themselves whatever they want. However, their capacity for such a creative process is limited. In the process of framing their decision in a way that renders their claim to a stable identity legitimate, the women communicate their understandings of notions of identity, community, and belonging. The women also show a nuanced regard for sexual categories. They stretch the boundaries of some categories, while preserving and even policing the boundaries of other categories. This book is in no way an ex-gay narrative. It is entirely the voices of feminist, queer women who find themselves viewed by society as heterosexual, but who themselves, with two exceptions, do not identify as such. This book is a rich collection of wonderfully human stories about what it means to be “true” to oneself.

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9781498505635

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Reviews

What happens when you're a (former?) dyke in love with a dude? In this book, Tabatabai presents dazzling narratives from women who are not straight, not bisexual, not lesbian--their identities suspended in parentheses, question marks, and ellipses. This group of women, often misunderstood and on the margins of many communities, work to make their identities coherent to themselves and others through a series of embodied choices that Tabatabai deftly disentangles. Ultimately, these are stories about belonging and boundaries as women work to build lives that are both visible and meaningful.--Carla A. Pfeffer, University of South Carolina An engaging study from which much can be learned about the power of narratives in orchestrating the fluidity of our sexual lives.--Ken Plummer, University of Essex

What happens when you're a (former?) dyke in love with a dude? In this book, Tabatabai presents dazzling narratives from women who are not straight, not bisexual, not lesbian-their identities suspended in parentheses, question marks, and ellipses. This group of women, often misunderstood and on the margins of many communities, work to make their identities coherent to themselves and others through a series of embodied choices that Tabatabai deftly disentangles. Ultimately, these are stories about belonging and boundaries as women work to build lives that are both visible and meaningful. -- Carla A. Pfeffer, University of South Carolina An engaging study from which much can be learned about the power of narratives in orchestrating the fluidity of our sexual lives. -- Ken Plummer, University of Essex

What happens when you’re a (former?) dyke in love with a dude? In this book, Tabatabai presents dazzling narratives from women who are not straight, not bisexual, not lesbian—their identities suspended in parentheses, question marks, and ellipses. This group of women, often misunderstood and on the margins of many communities, work to make their identities coherent to themselves and others through a series of embodied choices that Tabatabai deftly disentangles. Ultimately, these are stories about belonging and boundaries as women work to build lives that are both visible and meaningful. -- Carla A. Pfeffer, University of South Carolina An engaging study from which much can be learned about the power of narratives in orchestrating the fluidity of our sexual lives. -- Ken Plummer, University of Essex

Author Information

Ahoo Tabatabai is assistant professor of sociology in the Psychology and Sociology Department at Columbia College.

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