Overview

""A brave, deeply embodied account of trauma healing . . . reminding us that true medicine is not the substance itself, but the integration, relationship, and Self-leadership that follow . . . a meaningful contribution to the future of trauma-informed psychedelic care."" -RICK DOBLIN, founder and president of MAPS Dr. Kim Taylor thought she'd grown up in a ""normal"" family, where the absence of verbal affection and physical touch were all she knew. Raised on a diet of fast food and grease bombs, she spent her childhood overweight, learning early to deflect bullying with humor. Over time, chasing substantial goals-college, medical school, training for grueling athletic pursuits-ensured she had no opportunity to look within. Until a shocking diagnosis changed everything. Throwing herself into research, Kim discovered the source of her illness was likely rooted in emotional trauma. Though reluctant to seek out a therapist, she connected with a professional who introduced her to IFS-Internal Family Systems-therapy, a modality that addresses various ""parts"" of our internal landscape. Through therapeutic sessions and the writing of letters, both with and without the assistance of plant medicines, communication with these parts opened avenues of self-understanding and healing Kim didn't realize were possible-the core of which revealed years of unrealized emotional neglect. In an often raw and often painful journey of finding her way back to Self, Kim lays herself bare in this deeply honest and affecting memoir that stirringly utilizes songs as representational guideposts-and shows us what it looks like to courageously shift from five decades of living in a state of detachment within the head space, to embodiment with a sense of solace in the heart space, not in a prescriptive way, but in an inspiring and beautifully human way.

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KIM TAYLOR is a physician, endurance athlete, and trauma survivor whose healing journey led her beyond the limits of conventional medicine and into the world of deep inner work. After facing a series of physical and emotional breaking points-including an MS diagnosis, caregiving burnout, and the collapse of old coping systems-Kim turned inward.Through Internal Family Systems (IFS), ketamine-assisted psychotherapy, Psychedelic Somatic Interactional Psychotherapy (PSIP), and somatic-based therapy, Kim began to map the complex landscape of her inner world-one part at a time. Writing became her way in.In this debut work, Kim shares her story not as a therapist, but as someone who's done the hard work of healing from the inside out. Her letters, reflections, and raw accounts of transformation offer a unique perspective for anyone navigating trauma, dissociation, attachment wounds, or the longing to reconnect with the Self.She lives with her rescue dog, Dobby, and continues to explore what it means to belong to herself.

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