Overview

Selima Hill's twenty-second collection A Man, a Woman & a Hippopotamus presents ten sequences of short poems, prose poems and short pieces on relationships and doings between people, animals and the world at large. Self-portrait with a Bucket: On being an artist's model. The Mathematician: A man and woman trying to agree. A Man, a Woman & a Chihuahua: Different people's senses of bafflement with each other. Baby Peter: A homeless man and his mother. Agatha: An afternoon in a care home. Room 17: A 70-year-old woman, baffled but determined. Men in Shorts and Bonkers: Out walking with dogs and their humans. Until the Tears Roll Down My Cheeks like Honey: Two strangers in a field. The Surly Mothers of Successful Men: Short pieces of memoir.

Full Product Details

Author:   Selima Hill
Publisher:   Bloodaxe Books Ltd
Imprint:   Bloodaxe Books Ltd
Edition:   Paperback original
Dimensions:   Width: 13.80cm , Height: 1.60cm , Length: 21.60cm
ISBN:  

9781780377520

ISBN 10:   1780377525
Pages:   272
Publication Date:   23 October 2025
Audience:   General/trade ,  General
Format:   Paperback
Publisher's Status:   Active
Availability:   In Print  
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Table of Contents

SELF-PORTRAIT WITH A BUCKET 28 Self-portrait with an Armadillo 28 Self-portrait on a Bathmat 28 Self-portrait with a Beautiful Face 29 Self-portrait with the Blessed Virgin Mary 29 Self-portrait with a Book 29 Self-portrait with My Brother 30 Self-portrait with a Bunch of Roses in Front of My Face 30 Self-portrait as a Corpse 30 Self-portrait with a Cowpat 31 Self-portrait with Crawling Mothers 31 Self-portrait with a Crown of Thorns 31 Self-portrait in a Cupboard 32 Self-portrait with Curly Hair, Holding a Mushroom 32 Self-portrait as Their Daughter 33 Self-portrait, Deep in Thought 33 Self-portrait with a Doe 33 Self-portrait as a Duck 34 Self-portrait as a Footballer, Carrying a Bucket 34 Self-portrait with a Furious Headmaster 34 Self-portrait in Goggles 35 Self-portrait with a Hammer 35 Self-portrait with a Hornet 35 Self-portrait with My Husband 36 Self-portrait with a Jelly on My Head 36 Self-portrait in a Jumbo Jet 36 Self-portrait in the Kitchen with a Spoon 37 Self-portrait with a Lettuce 37 Self-portrait in the Lido 37 Self-portrait with a Mosquito 38 Self-portrait with My Mother-in-Law 38 Self-portrait as Myself 38 Self-portrait with a Neighbour Who Doesn’t Like Swimming 39 Self-portrait in 1975 39 Self-portrait with Novak Djokovik 39 Self-portrait in a Pair of Expensive Italian High Heels 40 Self-portrait with a Pair of Tweezers 40 Self-portrait with a Pan of Tomato Sauce 40 Self-portrait with a Parrot on My Shoulder 41 Self-portrait with Parsley 41 Self-portrait in a Peach-coloured Bath 41 Self-portrait as a Pebble 42 Self-portrait with a Piglet 42 Self-portrait as a Pilot 42 Self-portrait with a Pound of Flesh 43 Self-portrait in a Restaurant 43 Self-portrait in a Sauna 43 Self-portrait at the Seaside 44 Self-portrait in Several Harnesses 44 Self-portrait with a Shoe 44 Self-portrait in the Shower 45 Self-portrait in a Side Room 45 Self-portrait as a Sock 45 Self-portrait Standing in a Queue Beside a Businessman 46 Self-portrait with Straightened Hair 46 Self-portrait with a Tin of Golden Syrup 46 Self-portrait with the Toenail of a Saint 47 Self-portrait as a Tufty-eared Red River Hog 47 Self-portrait with an Umbrella 47 Self-portrait, Undressed 48 Self-portrait with an Unknown Man 48 Self-portrait with a Wall 48 Self-portrait with X in the Dark Woods THE MATHEMATICIAN 50 Classic Cars 50 The Cake 50 Bear 51 Having to Remember Every Day 51 The Picnic 52 Far into the Night 52 Friends 52 Violins and Salad 53 The Mathematician and the Parrot 53 Friendship 53 The Value of Difficult People 54 What He Likes About His New Home 54 Sunshine 55 Eels 55 The Meeting 55 Buns 55 The Man on the Sofa (1) 56 Bananas 56 Dogs and Bears 56 The Angry Man 56 Girls Like Me 57 Doing Something Drastic About My Hair 58 The Emperor 58 Vermiculite (1) 58 And Another Question 59 The Man on the Sofa (2) 59 The Fence 59 The Colour of the Cushion 60 The Upside-down Dog 60 The Graceless Man 60 The Yellow Lorry 61 The Driver 61 The Anniversary 61 The Visitors 62 The Nursery 62 The Meaning of Barf 62 The Clap of Thunder 62 Persian Primer 63 Helping Others 63 My Friend in the Woolly Hat 63 The Nose 64 The Bear Woman 64 Dogs and Mathematicians 64 Vermiculite (2) 65 Bras in the Sun 65 The Whistling Man 65 Sunday Afternoon 66 Violence 66 Sleep 66 What I’m Trying to Say A MAN, A WOMAN AND A CHIHUAHUA 68 A Man, A Woman and a Crossword Puzzle 68 A Man, A Woman and A Piece of Cake 68 A New Pair of Boots 68 Annabel 68 Bring Nadine 69 But People Do Love You 69 Can I Get You Something? 69 Cooked Breakfasts and Shrieks 69 Dead Flies 70 Dinner with My Father 70 Eggs 70 Expensive Cheeses 70 Field Guide to Spiders of Britain and Northern Europe 71 Friendly People 71 He’s Got More Money Than He Knows What To Do With 71 His Ebullient Aunt’s Latest Adventures in Eastern Europe and the Third World 71 His Little Sausage 71 Home 72 Ice Cream and Jelly 72 Impatience 72 It Hasn’t Stopped Raining for Days 72 J. 73 Mary 73 Midnight 73 My Bony Hands 73 My Miserable Sister 73 ‘My Miserable Sister’ 74 Nudity 74 Panther 74 Peaburgers 74 PRIVATE 75 Roly 75 Sardines 75 Sex with Jockeys 75 Sheep 75 Sin 76 Swimming with the Banker 76 The Afternoon of Her Arrival 76 The Air in the Mountains 76 The Answer Is Yes 76 The Box of Chocolates 77 The Chocolate Chip Cookie That My Daughter Had Given Me 77 The Ear 77 The Empty Room 77 The Ewe 78 The Famous Museum 78 The Fox 78 The Funeral 78 The Gift 79 The Hare 79 The Heart-throb 79 The Holiday-makers 79 The Key 79 The Little Dog 80 The Lonely Son 80 The Long Boring Journey 80 The Loony-bin 80 The Man in the Ugly Shoes 81 The Man Next Door 81 The Man with Four Dogs 81 The Mental Health of Footballers 81 The Orange Towel 82 The Perfect Coat 82 The Picture of His Mother 82 The Resident 82 The Sculpture 83 The Singer 83 The Sobbing Woman Lying on the Floor 83 The Spider 83 The Swimmer and the Man in a Tweed Coat 84 The Visitor 84 The Woman by the River 84 The Woman Who Doesn’t Smile 84 Two Things I Know about the Hummingbird Hawk-moth 84 Two Women I Don’t Recognise 85 Two Women in a Restaurant 85 Uncles 85 Vodka 85 Wednesday Afternoon at the Lido 85 Welcome Home 86 What Makes Me Happy BABY PETER 88 The Tent 88 Pig 89 Woman Alone in a Flat 90 Strawberry Jam 91 The Waltzer 91 Cuckoo 92 Baby Peter and the Cushions 92 From His Bedroom on the Fourteenth Floor 93 A Good Boy 93 The Verger’s Toes 94 Baby Peter and the Rats 94 Miserable Owls 95 Baby Peter and the Good Shepherd 95 Children in Go-karts 96 The Reservoir 96 Baby Peter Lying on the Mat 97 Catalogues 97 The Fight in the Snow 98 Orange Squash 98 The Accident 99 Beetle Mother 99 To Be the Mother of a Helpless Baby 99 Brothers for Peter 100 Pity 100 Pork 100 Baby Peter’s Orange Bear 101 Baby Peter and the Doll 101 No One Ever Tells You 102 Cake 102 Yellow Grass AGATHA 104 The Billionaire in His Office 104 Yachts at Sea 105 In the Silence of the Hush 105 Intimacy 106 How Old is Old? 106 Whippets 106 Sunday Nights at the Care Home 107 Sadness 107 Soup 107 Old People in Tea-rooms 108 The Happy Faces of the Very Old 108 The Young 108 The Simple Fact 109 White Mice 109 Chocolate Biscuits 109 Sleepless Nights 110 The Horse 110 Like the Lost at Sea 110 The Petite Housewife 111 The Ewe 111 Chocolate-tipped Meringues 112 Rich and Famous 112 The Residents 113 George 113 The Billionairess 113 Skin 114 Smile, Smile, Smile 114 Woman in a Chair 115 The Tablecloth 115 The Elderly 116 Concrete in May 116 Ugly Shoes 116 Happy Little Faces 117 Does He Want to Reach a Ripe Old Age? 117 Men in Winter 117 Meeting the Vicar 118 Wilhelmina 118 Pool 119 The Old Exist 119 What They Still Remember 119 Being Old is Such a Waste of Time 120 Duck 120 Cooking 121 Spectacles 121 The Old Woman and the Young Man 121 People Who Are Old Don’t Have Fun 122 These Furious Adults 122 He Died the Way He Chose to Die 122 People Who Are Old Are No Fun 123 Mothers 123 The Warm Hot-water-bottle 124 What’s the Point of Being Happy? 124 People Who Are Old Can’t Be Trusted 124 Brassieres 125 The Father of the Late Billionaire 125 Success 125 Debut Novels 126 You Can Ask for Anything You Want 126 Mowing the Lawn 126 Spiders 127 Old Ladies 127 The Old Man and His Dog 128 Awe 128 Being Trampled on by Labradors 128 The Woman Who Escaped 129 Arthur 129 The Avenue 129 The Man Who Loved His Poodle 130 Mrs X 130 Josephine 130 Out Beyond the Cedars in their Wheelchairs ROOM 17 133 The Grandmother Goes Shopping 133 A Grandmother Who Star-jumps 133 The Grandmother Goes Swimming 134 The Grandmother and Her Granddaughters 134 The Grandmother in the Park 134 The Grandmother and Coco 135 The Grandmother and Michelle at the Swimming Pool 135 The Grandmother and Her Chocolates 135 The Grandmother and the Rabbits 136 The Grandmother and the Woman Next Door 136 Grandmothers with Sweets 136 The Grandmother Relaxes 137 Grandmothers and Love 137 The Grandmother and the Visitor 137 The Grandmother and the Chickens 138 The Grandmother and the Vertiginous Hillside 138 The Grandmother and Her Carnations 138 The Grandmother and Mr Tsitsipas 139 The Grandmother in the Afternoon 139 The Grandmother and the Lion 139 The Grandmother in the Lake 140 The Grandmother and Her Bike 140 The Grandmother at the Surgery 140 The Grandmother and Her Grandson 141 The Grandmother in Her Frilly Dress 141 The Grandmother and the Pool Attendant 141 The Grandmother’s Sofa 142 The Grandson’s Teeth 142 The Grandmother and Sky-diving 142 The Grandmother and the Tweed Coat 143 The Grandmother and the Rat 143 The Grandmother and a Member of the Public 144 The Grandmother at the Station 144 The Grandmother and Her Visitors 145 The Grandmother in the Shower-room 145 The Grandmother’s Birthday 145 The Grandmother in Bed 146 The Grandmother’s Unbearable Mortification 146 The Grandmother in the Road 146 The Grandmother’s Hair 147 The Grandmother at the Pharmacy 147 The Grandmother’s Knees 147 The Grandmother Upstairs 148 The Grandmother in the Forest 148 The Grandmother and the Pears 148 The Grandmother on the Bus 149 The Grandmother’s Neck 149 The Grandmother and the Wives of Violent Men 149 The Grandmother in a Sombrero 150 The Grandmother’s Frock 150 The Grandmother and the Doctor’s Thigh 150 The Grandmother’s Shoes 151 The Grandmother’s Smile 151 The Boredom of the Late Pool Attendant 151 The Grandmother and Her Enormous Children 152 The Grandmother and the Murderers 152 The Grandmother’s New Home 152 The Grandmother’s New Friends 153 The Grandmother and the Goose 153 The Grandmother in Her Room 153 The Grandmother and Her Apples 154 The Grandson and the Doctor 154 The Grandmother on the Lawn 154 Grandmother’s Chins 155 The Grandmother and the Counsellors 155 The Grandmother Paints Her Face 155 The Grandmother Laughs 156 The Grandmother at the Grand Hotel 156 The Grandmother and her Greetings Cards 156 The Grandmother at Night 157 The Grandmother in the Flower Bed 157 The Grandmother Enjoys Her Tea 157 The Grandmother Goes for a Walk 158 The Grandmother’s Bell 158 The Grandmother at Mealtimes 158 The Grandmother and the Sound of Laughter 159 The Grandmother and Erling Haaland 160 Flocks of Sheep 160 The Grandmother Who Loved to Chat MEN IN SHORTS 163 Men 163 Springtime 163 The Woman with the Corgi 164 Husbands 164 The Nice Cow 164 The Neapolitan Mastiff 165 Several Lovers 165 The Priest 165 Brothers 166 The Tall Policeman 166 Nishikori 166 Manliness 167 The Letter 167 The Sea 167 The Tiny Reed Warbler 168 Drowning 168 Power-boats 168 Motherhood 169 The Genius 169 Wild Flowers 169 A View of the Sea 170 Playing Cricket in the Mist 170 Cathedral 170 What It’s Like to Ride a Cow 171 The Flautist 171 Huskies 171 What My Mother Said 172 Jealousy 172 Dentistry 172 The Beard 173 Little Rabbits 173 BBQ 173 The Tubby Whippets 174 Rain 174 The Terrible Mess 174 Fathers 175 Running 175 Love 175 The Mysterious Man 176 Visitors 176 The Woman with the Lab 176 Cows 176 Our Plans for Today 177 The Man from Cheshire 177 The Word Mistress 177 The Musician 178 The Adorable Man 178 Summertime BONKERS 181 The Afghan Hound 181 The Basset Griffon Vendeens 181 The Basset Hound 181 The Bichon Frise 181 The Boxer 181 The Bulldog 183 The Cavalier King Charles Spaniel 183 The Chow 183 The Chihuahua 184 The Cocker Spaniel 190 The Pomeranian 190 The Rhodesian Ridgeback 190 The Saluki 191 The Scottish Terrier 191 The Setters 191 The Sheltie 192 The Shih Tzus 192 The Springer Spaniel 192 The Standard Poodle 193 The Stray 193 The Weimaraner 193 The West Highland Whites 194 The Whippet 194 The Yorkshire Terrier UNTIL THE YEARS ROLL DOWN MY CHEEKS LIKE HONEY 196 The One-legged Man 196 Birdsong 197 His Dusty Jacket and His Ice-cold Hands 197 Being Looked at by a Man Standing Very Close Beside Me 198 The Tall Giraffe 198 The Mystery of My Submission 199 Menswear 199 Please Can He Not Know a Thing about Me 200 What Other People Think 200 Sitting on the Bench like a Snail 201 Jesus and the Radios 201 Two Strangers in a Field with Some Sheep 202 My Private Life 202 It Hasn’t Stopped Raining For Days 203 Please Don’t Answer Chess 203 Alone with Me 204 The Golden Lion 204 I Need a Haircut and I Need It Now 205 The Hide-out in the Mountains 205 Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea 205 Never Mention Mother 206 Bobby Fischer’s Eyes 206 The Sun Will Rise Tomorrow 206 It’s Possible to Walk in the Countryside 207 A Visit to the Grave of the Dancer 207 A Snowy Afternoon in December 208 A Slice of Cake Wrapped in Silverfoil 208 Everything About Him 209 Angry Golfers, Sinister Children 209 St Catherine of Siena and her Ring 210 My Big Worry 210 Everybody Loves Me 210 So Woebegone, So Flabby, So Alone 211 The Smile, When It Comes… 211 A Jumble of Old Radios 211 My Controversial Theory about Bobby Fischer 212 The Aeroplane 212 The Disappearing Mouse 212 Fantasy Involving a Hairbrush 213 How to Share a Banana 214 A Boring Man 214 A Man and a Woman on a Bench 214 Please Don’t Be Afraid to Meet My Eye 215 The Man Who Didn’t Sleep 215 The Man is Gone 216 Dachshunds 217 The Day He Took His Jacket Off 217 Outside the Golf Club Car Park on a Windy Day 218 Kafka’s Fear of Mice THE SURLY MOTHERS OF SUCCESSFUL MEN 220 The Bungalow (1) 220 Palazzo Trousers 220 Ants (1) 220 My Uncle’s Private Parts 221 My Mother-in-Law Comes to Tea 221 The Boulder 221 Culottes 221 The Leg of the One-legged Jockey 221 Father (1) 222 The Man in Pyjamas 222 Wedding Day 222 Fountains 222 Foible 222 The Woman in the Purple Trousers 223 Walking Backwards 223 The Visitor Regards My Big Black Dog 223 The Surly Mothers of Successful Men (1) 223 The Dirty Look 223 The Electricity Sub-station 224 What to Teach Your Children 224 The Little Stone 224 The Man with Undyed Hair 224 The Other Person 224 Ears 225 The Wounds of Successful Men 225 Heatwave 225 The Leftover Sausages 225 Buckinghamshire 225 Roger Federer in Switzerland 226 Question (1) 226 The Visit to the Care Home 226 Uncles 226 The Doctor’s Question I Found So Hard to Answer 226 Women with Straight Hair 227 Bathmat 227 Bodies in the Snow 227 The Things He Says 227 The Holiday 228 The Residents 228 Gentleness 228 The Letter H 228 Salt 229 My Uncle’s Cooking 229 The Sister Who Didn’t Exist 229 Mouth 230 The Bungalow (2) 230 The Doctor’s Hands 230 Lip Balm 230 Girls Who Disobey 231 Pineapple Shampoo 231 The One-legged Jockey and the Cook 231 Cacti 231 My Mother’s Bed 232 The Knife 232 Timetables 232 Well-meaning Actions 232 Advice to the Reader 232 My Earliest Memory 233 Chicken 233 Symptoms 233 All My Endless Questions 233 The Orange Dress 233 The Aunt and Her Dog 234 Question (2) 234 The Lost and Found Dog Disc 234 At the Pool (1) 234 The Visitor 234 Screams (1) 235 The Sort of Person Who 235 The Man Who Was Crying 235 The Letter B 235 A Love of Punctuation 235 But What’s It Like? 236 Person Talking While Standing in the Sea 236 Her Small Son 236 Woman in a Wetsuit 236 Snakes 237 Bereavement (1) 237 Tuesdays 237 Density 237 The Library at Night 237 Screams (2) 238 The Girl Made of Glass 238 Bausch 238 The Telephone Call 238 Hope 239 The Man Who Taught Me Greek 239 The Man Shouting into His Phone 239 Question (3) 239 Women Carrying Bowls 239 Bluebell 240 My Inability to Drive 240 The Same for Everyone 240 Somewhere in Lincolnshire 240 Prayer (1) 240 Her Mother’s Cheek 241 The Poodle 241 The Timetable 241 The Interesting Tumble-dryer 241 The Elephant Kanchenjunga 241 Prayer (2) 242 The Stolen Tennis-ball 242 There’s Nothing Wrong with Ducks 242 The Widower at Night 242 In the Garden Shed when the Door Slams Shut 242 The Date 243 The Bungalow (3) 243 Child in a Flat 243 Humiliation 243 The Little Play 243 Granny and the Cloud 244 La Belle Hélène 244 Little Things Are Happening All the Time 244 Man in the Street 244 The Outing 244 Question (4) 245 The Dream of the Dreamer 245 My Dog at 9 a.m. 245 The Sound of Breaking Glass 245 The Surly Mothers of Successful Men (2) 246 The Shimmering Lake 246 Mum and the Fly 246 Ironmonger 246 September Evenings at My Grandmother’s 246 Me-Time 247 Mary (1) 247 His Other Girlfriend 247 The New Cardigan 247 The Most Interesting Thing About Me 248 Heaven 248 The Prefab 248 Mrs P. 249 Strawberry Jam 249 Who I Am 249 The Stranger’s Car 249 Smoothie at Midnight 249 Bereavement (2) 250 To the Reader 250 Fun 250 Question (5) 250 As I Tried to Explain Years Later 250 What I Asked the Person Standing Next to Me 251 China Blue 251 The Hearty Breakfast 251 The Blessed Virgin Mary Goes Swimming 251 He Told Me To Make a List (1) 251 The Surly Mothers of Successful Men (3) 252 Ants (2) 252 Weight 252 The Kitten 252 Spiders 252 My Sister’s Hair 252 Cucumber 253 He Told Me To Make a List (2) 253 Prayer (3) 253 The Problems of Taking It in Turns 253 At the Pool (2) 253 The Irish Terrier and the Irish Terrier’s Owner 254 Thicket 254 On Passing a Field with 7 Cows and 7 Sheep in It 254 The Bungalow (4) 254 Yes 254 Two Cows in a Meadow 255 You and Me 255 The Clinical Psychologist (1) 255 My Friends 255 The Surprise Birthday Present 255 My Grandmother’s Dressing-gown 256 Zvuv 256 The Clinical Psychologist (2) 256 B. on Honeymoon 256 A & E 256 Things She Wishes She Had Brought on Holiday 257 Clairvoyance 257 My Dentist’s Eyes 257 The Search 257 The General’s Pyjamas 257 My Sister Whines 258 Purity of Heart 258 Wasps (1) 258 The Barista 258 The Woman with Thick Ankles 258 The Level Crossing 259 As the Bus Sails Past My Stop 259 My First Giraffe 259 Father (2) 259 My Own Mother 260 A Simple Question 260 The Woman in the Drawing-room 260 Mary (2) 260 What to Say 261 Apricot Lover 261 My Mother in Particular 261 Herons 261 Wasps (2) 261 The Clinical Psychologist (3) 262 Pins 262 The Child Within 262 The Man Who Walks 30 Miles a Day 262 Lambs 262 Cow at Night 263 The Birthday Present 263 Ice Hockey 263 Question (7) 263 The Bishop Digs a Hole 263 Sideboard 264 The Bungalow (5) 264 The Peacock 264 Birds 264 The Loving Hand 265 Happy Birthday 265 The Parrot 265 Golf 265 Omelette 266 The Right Amount of Smiling 266 The Man Who Doesn’t Want To Be Forgiven 266 The Happy Couple 266 My Sister Accuses Me of Being an Attention-seeker 266 Faith 267 Mayonnaise 267 The Spoon (Testing My Powers of Observation) 267 The Cold Fish 268 Cookie 268 The Burning House 268 The Bungalow (6) 271 Notes & acknowledgements

Reviews

The miniaturism of Martial and Emily Dickinson is reinvented in this iridescent collection which brings together 11 sequences whose subjects range from girls misbehaving in convent schools to fridges contemplating death, plus a pair of bad-tempered sisters, a parrot and hair clips... Over 254 pages, Hill creates a new kind of narrative poem, which has all the rewards of reading a good novel – or novels – yet she retains poetry’s unique ability to zoom in on minutiae, as when contemplating ants whizzing about like bumper cars... -- Philip Terry * The Guardian (The best recent poetry) on Women in Comfortable Shoes * Selima Hill is an inimitable talent. The mind is fragile and unreliable in her poetry, but is also tenacious and surprising, capable of the most extraordinary responses, always fighting back with language as its survival kit. Life in general might be said to be her subject, the complications, contradictions and consequences of simply existing. Nevertheless, Hill’s writing is eminently readable and approachable, even fun at times, the voice of a person and a poet who will not be quieted and will not conform to expectations, especially poetic ones. -- Simon Armitage * Poet Laureate, on behalf of The King's Gold Medal for Poetry Committee * This is the twenty-first poetry collection from the unstoppable Selima Hill. These days she tends to present her work as sequences of small poems, some extremely minimal. Women in Comfortable Shoes consists of eleven such sequences. Their power lies not so much in the individual poems as in the cumulative, immersive effect of each sequence, and in Hill’s charismatic voice which seizes attention from the get-go … I seem to see the world more vividly and sense it more intensely after reading Selima Hill, and this highly readable collection is no exception. She shakes things up and wakes up your mind like no other poet. She’d probably hate to hear me saying this but – genius! -- Annie Fisher * The Friday Poem *

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Selima Hill .

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